One of my bugbears is when people refuse to take responsibility for their actions, they project everything out there on to the mythical "they". Of course, we all have a tendency to do it some of the time, but it's really unhelpful - if we don't accept responsibility, then we definitely can't have any influence over the direction of our life, it will always be up to "them".
The first step is to be a bit self-aware.It's essential to know in what way our behaviours and attitudes are affecting those around us, creating the response we receive. We are, without question, the authors of our own story, so if you're the common denominator in some difficult or unpleasant experiences (and the same is true for enjoyable ones!) and it's making you unhappy (or happy!) it's probably worth considering what your contribution may have been.
Embarrassment or shame can mean we try to cover up, blame others, to avoid looking stupid/unkind/lazy/whatever, so it could be useful to know what is really behind the embarrassment and shame, then we can deal with it or manage it. That requires self-examination and reflection.
Self-awareness can also be quite painful - it's never particularly gratifying to discover our shortcomings or failings, but denying them won't make them disappear or prevent them from causing us problems. The only way to deal with them effectively is to face them, so you can reduce their impact.
